Last week my sister and I toured a long term care facility. At 100 and a half my mom is getting difficult for my sister to take care of. One of the concerns is that although Mom doesn't talk much and definitely seems to be sinking into senility, she still knows who she is, where she is and who she is talking to. She may not remember it later, but in the moment, she still knows stuff.
We don't want to just put her in the nursing home to be unhappy. We are all fatigued of taking care of her because she is 100 and we have been supplying care in one way or another for a long time. And we will keep doing this, but we are trying to also have our own lives.
In the tour of the nursing home I mentioned hospice. I had been wondering if hospice could provide some sort of help for us. My sister really needs a break sometimes. Dressing, laundering, cleaning up, making food for, and entertaining my mom is a lot, not to mention medications and monitoring blood sugar and blood pressure. The tour guide then told us about respite care that the long term care facility provides, sometimes through hospice.
While it is a small thing, the weight of the world fell off of me. If my sister had an emergency, the plan had been for me to drive over and try to care for Mom in my sister's home. There are some back up people that could be called on, but it would mainly fall on me. I feel very nervous about that. I am not a nursing type and I never would have volunteered to take care of my mom in my home.
That one question has opened a door for us to consider in the care of my mother. There may be some help available. It may not be entirely up to us.
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