An Unexpected Gift

 Before the pandemic started, when 2020 looked like a year of promise, I purchased tickets to Hamilton which was coming to town in May. I inadvertently purchased through a different site than Metrotix.  I was afraid it was a mistake as soon as I did it, but I decided just to trust.

Then, as we all know the performances were canceled.  I requested my money back.  They gave me credit for extra performances.  I asked for my money back.  I didn't get it.  By that time I was just hoping to live through the pandemic.  It made me angry and upset whenever I tried to deal with it.  So, I let it go. 

Then almost 2 years later, this December, I got an email from the ticket company.  It said, if I wanted the money back, I needed to request it.  So, I did.  I decided if they needed any information from me, I wouldn't give it.  I didn't plan to be scammed again.

Then, right before Christmas, lo and behold, the amount I had paid for the tickets showed up in my credit card account. I was in awe.  I never expected to see anything from that whole ticket thing again.  I thought the offer to return the money was a scam.

But, now, I picture little angels in the background conspiring to give me a Christmas present.  I was amazed and delighted.  This was truly an unexpected gift.

Hope

 The first candle of Advent is dedicated to Hope.  I find that reassuring and comforting.  I have had some times in my life when Hope, in better days, in heaven, in some future thing was what I held onto.  I needed to have hope because the present circumstances were not good.  In times that were good, I wanted to send hope into the world for others.  Everybody has hard times.  Everybody needs hope.

Hope is the joy, the activity of waiting.  There is beauty in preparing for the next thing to come.

Row, Row, Row Your Boat

The children's song--Row, Row, Row Your Boat continues--gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream.  I was thinking about struggles I have had.  I am trying to learn to let go and not obsess or worry about things.  First thing in the morning I am usually really good at letting go and letting God.  In the middle of the day I ask myself--how important is it? In the evening I remind myself to think about it tomorrow.  But, at night, the worries crawl out of the corner or from under the bed.

I don't have a lot of worries.  There are things that bother me though. I was recently cheated over some tickets I bought to a show that was cancelled, no refund, no show, theoretical credit toward some future show.  I tried, but I wasn't able to do anything about it.  I am out of luck.  All day I am fine.  But, at night I start to worry and get angry and upset.  I pray.  It helps some, but I wish I could say that prayer helped me to put the upset away.  It does only to some extent.  I don't know what to do with the feelings I have about being cheated, robbed, and duped.

This afternoon I was trying to think about some song or prayer that I could focus on when the upset starts.  The rosary is good, but I haven't always been able to use that as a go to when I am upset.  I can pray a whole rosary and be upset when I finish.  The little song Row, Row, Row Your Boat came to me as a possibility.  It has a nice philosophy.  Don't give up and do nothing, I still need to row the boat, but gently down the stream, not against the current.  And if I row my boat, things might just be merry and maybe I could dream.  I think that is just what I need.  Tonight, if I find myself in turmoil I will try singing that little ditty and maybe I will be able to sleep and perchance to dream.