The Waiting Begins

Advent started yesterday.  Most of the "Advent Calendars" start tomorrow, December 1.  The length of the season varies, but most calendars don't.  Advent is a time of waiting.  When I was a kid it was all about the presents on Christmas. I was waiting to see what I got.  I noticed the world getting prettier and the families coming together, but when I was a kid I have to admit the main thing was the presents.

As I got older I looked forward to seeing the people I loved and didn't get to see as much, like my cousins and my grandparents. It was surprising to me that at some point the gifts I got didn't give me much joy, but the gifts I gave made me happy.  Advent became about shopping.

Then as an adult with my own family, I looked forward to the delight in my child's eyes as he opened gifts.  Having a child rekindled the joy of Christmas.  It wasn't just about shopping, it was the experience.

Overlaid in all of those Advent experiences was Church. When I was young Christmas and Church was hard to figure out because my church doesn't decorate for Christmas until Christmas.  Before the day, the celebrations focus on purple and pink and waiting. It took a while for that concept to sink in for me. We continue with the carols and the trees and the Christmas celebration way into January.  Most of the world has moved on.

I can't define the exact moment when I finally felt the joy of the arrival of Jesus at Christmas.  I am sure that the first midnight Mass I attended while I was a teenager began that dawning.  Lectoring at Christmas Masses brought that feeling closer to me also.  But, visiting Bethlehem a couple of years ago an touching the spot where Jesus was born cemented that feeling of joy, of hearing angels singing.

These days gifts don't do much for me.  I would like to get together with my whole family, but I think that will have to wait for a different year.  I will be happy to see the people closest to me. I will no doubt attend church on my computer.  I will look forward to another year when things are different.

This year in less than ideal circumstances I will welcome the arrival of Jesus in my heart.  I will reflect on Christmases past and present and yet to come. But, right now, this Advent, I will wait and watch and pray.