Singing Along

 Love's Old Sweet Song to sing along. I loved once but it was not returned. I no longer trust the idea of love with the exception of friends and family.  I love, but I have found love isn't returned most of the time, even by friends and family. I don't expect to "fall in love" again.  I don't trust that kind of love.

The love in my life had conditions and manipulations and pain. I have always been the strong one, the leader, the oldest, the giver.  But, I wanted protection and care and concern for my well being.  I once thought that I could make someone love me, that the things I did or didn't do would change the way someone felt toward me.  

I have learned to love myself.  I have learned not to expect change from another.  They are who they are. And they might not reveal who they are until we are down the road a ways.  I don't have the patience to find out the broken parts in someone else and whether they grate with the broken parts of me.

I will sing Love's Old Sweet Song, but only as a longing.  I will honor the idea of love, but I do not expect to find it for myself. I am happy for all the love around and the people who have been able to find it.