Monday, November 28, 2016

Love of Money.....

I like to spend money.  I enjoy hunting for things I want and need.  I am very privileged in my first world life to have that pleasure.  I have more than I need.  Not as much as I want, but more than I need for sure.  I learned in my past life to be a saver, to not need new shiny things all the time.  Most of the things I buy have some practical use.

Recently, I had to divide my assets with another person.  That person claimed to love me.  The state required a 50-50 split.  I recognized that the claim of love was not unconditional love.  I recognized it from the first of our relationship.  I thought I could change that.  I have learned that the only one I can change is myself.  It was a crazy dream to think I could make someone love me.

Anyway, the 50-50 split gave way to demands for more and more money.  I admit I was angry about this.  We had a gentleman's agreement and it was tossed aside at the last minute to do what from my view was extort more money from me.  I considered fighting it, but what came to me is--I like to spend money, but I don't love money.  I don't need all the money I have coming to me.  I can make do with less.

What was made abdundantly clear to me is this--I was never loved by this person.  It was all about the money.  While that makes me sad, because I would have liked to have been loved, it frees me to move on and know that I did the right thing for me.  I hear the Lord whisper to me--You are loved, you are treasured, you deserve to be loved, not the money.  I wasn't planning to take the money to heaven with me anyway.

And there is this--the love of money is the root of all evil.  Note that it isn't the money itself, it is where the heart lies.  It is about what you love.

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