Saturday, May 3, 2014
Quilter and Mission
I am 60 and I no longer hope for another baby. Seriously, it would kill me to go through all of that. But it hasn't always been that way. For many younger years I went through fertility treatments or various kinds and then had an ectopic pregnancy (after begging a doctor to check my tubes and he gave me the zebra story).
After that I pouted. It was what I had to do for a while. I couldn't go to baby showers or be around other people's babies. I avoided the baby subject altogether whenever possible. I just didn't do babies. I cried secretly over baby ads and stories about pregnancies and "miracle babies."
Then, after losing a wife to breast cancer and marrying a younger woman, my brother had a baby. I was a Godmother. I made her a baby quilt. I was "into" babies again. I longed to be a grandmother. I talked to other grandmothers. I had enjoyed making that baby quilt. So, I made another.
Making baby quilts at first felt like practice for the "real" thing which was a grandchild of my own. At first I despaired that I would make all of these quilts and they would pile up in my house and no babies would ever come to use them. So, I prayed to God to send me some babies. For these quilts. And ever faithful, He did. It seems like I no sooner finish or lately start a quilt when a baby appears who needs one.
I learned something about me. I love to pray for babies. I love to use fabric and make little pieces of art that I call baby quilts. I love to give them away. I don't ever need to see or hold these babies. Praying for them is enough. I haven't given up that someday grandchild. He or she may appear someday. But, that isn't the only reason I make baby quilts.